I have shamefully been neglecting my blog.
But to be honest, nothing all that interesting has happened! Apart from our Unit 2 Drama production of "Teechers" AKA 40% of my A-Level grade. Eek. I dont have any photos yet though =[ It went well and that is all.
Basically, nothing funny has happened, nothing cool, nothing life-changing or out of the ordinary. NADA. ZILCH. C'EST NON.
Apart from mock exams, which lets admit are not what can be described as 'fun'. 3 hours of non-stop writing in history? I got a B though, i must admit is quite an achievement. BUT, my hand died after that exam. It was stuck like it was holding a pen! Literally. I put a pen between my fingers, and it STAYED there. Took quite a while to retain mobility. And that is the most interesting thing that has happened lately.
BUT Pri and me have worked out
16 more art lessons!And then its
OVER!!!!!!!!! WOOHOO.
Party in the common room that first Tuesday back...after our real exam time finishes we have 5 weeks of school, so me and Pri are dropping art for those 5 weeks, meaning...we have 4 extra frees cos no one else is allowed to drop until September! SCORE.
Moments over.
Anyway...there is nothing else to be said. Apart from a funny email Ben sent me.
Why We Like The British - FROM BRITISH NEWSPAPERS
1) Commenting on a complaint from a Mr. Arthur Purdey about a large gas
bill, a spokesman for North West Gas said, 'We agree it was rather high for
the time of year. It's possible Mr. Purdey has been charged for the gas
used up during the explosion that destroyed his house.' (The Daily
Telegraph)
2) Police reveal that a woman arrested for shoplifting had a whole salami
in her underwear. When asked why, she said it was because she was missing
her Italian boyfriend. (The Manchester Evening News)
5) At the height of the gale, the harbourmaster radioed a coastguard and
asked him to estimate the wind speed. He replied he was sorry, but he
didn't have a gauge. However, if it was any help, the wind had just blown
his Land Rover off the cliff. (Aberdeen Evening Express)
and these were just too funny, so im posting them all.
A list of actual announcements that London Tube train drivers have made to
their passengers...
1) 'Ladies and Gentlemen, I do apologize for the delay to your service. I
know you're all dying to get home, unless, of course, you happen to be
married to my ex-wife, in which case you'll want to cross over to the
Westbound and go in the opposite direction.'
2) 'Your delay this evening is caused by the line controller suffering from
E & B syndrome: not knowing his elbow from his backside. I'll let you know
any further information as soon as I'm given any.'
3) 'Do you want the good news first or the bad news? The good news is that
last Friday was my birthday and I hit the town and had a great time. The
bad news is that there is a points failure somewhere between Stratford and
East Ham, which means we probably won't reach our destination.'
4) 'Ladies and gentlemen, we apologize for the delay, but there is a
security alert at Victoria station and we are therefore stuck here for the
foreseeable future, so let's take our minds off it and pass some time
together. All together now.... 'Ten green bottles, hanging on a
wall.....'.'
5) 'We are now travelling through Baker Street... As you can see, Baker
Street is closed. It would have been nice if they had actually told me, so
I could tell you earlier, but no, they don't think about things like that'.
6) 'Beggars are operating on this train. Please do NOT encourage these
professional beggars. If you have any spare change, please give it to a
registered charity. Failing that, give it to me.'
7) During an extremely hot rush hour on the Central Line, the driver
announced in a West Indian drawl: 'Step right this way for the sauna,
ladies and gentleman... unfortunately, towels are not provided.'
8) 'Let the passengers off the train FIRST!' (Pause .) 'Oh go on then,
stuff yourselves in like sardines, see if I care - I'm going home....'
9) 'Please allow the doors to close. Try not to confuse this with 'Please
hold the doors open.' The two are distinct and separate instructions.'
10) 'Please note that the beeping noise coming from the doors means that
the doors are about to close. It does not mean throw yourself or your bags
into the doors.'
11) 'We can't move off because some idiot has their hand stuck in the
door.'
12) 'To the gentleman wearing the long grey coat trying to get on the
second carriage - what part of 'stand clear of the doors' don't you
understand?'
13) 'Please move all baggage away from the doors.' (Pause..) 'Please move
ALL belongings away from the doors.' (Pause...) 'This is a personal message
to the man in the brown suit wearing glasses at the rear of the train: Put
the pie down, Four-eyes, and move your bl**dy golf clubs away from the door
before I come down there and shove them up your a**e sideways!'
14) 'May I remind all passengers that there is strictly no smoking allowed
on any part of the Underground. However, if you are smoking a joint, it's
only fair that you pass it round the rest of the carriage.'
